Attorney & Staff Profile
Firm Threat Assessment
Fear of Joe
Fear of Megan
Meet Our Troupe
Former prosecutors. Board-certified trial specialists. Fully licensed to operate a tiny car. When the State brings in the clowns, we bring in more clowns. One of us hates clowns. One of us hates Halloween. One of us keeps bees. We do not discuss the Easter thing.
A Note on FearEveryone at this firm is horrified of Joe. This is normal, healthy, and encouraged. Joe is loud. Joe honks. Joe has bees. You can see Joe coming. Each profile below includes a Firm Threat Assessment rating that person's fear of Joe on a scale of one to ten, and their fear of Megan on a scale the firm has stopped trying to define. Please note that nobody rated Megan lower than Joe except Megan, Suzanne, and Joe, and that Joe declined to answer.
Click any member of the troupe for their full bio and threat assessment. The menus above go to the rest of the circus.
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Joseph C. Patituce
Former Prosecutor, Managing Ringmaster, The Mean Clown (Allegedly the Nice One)
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Megan M. Patituce
Former Prosecutor, Partner, Head of Intimidation, Off the Leash by Appointment Only
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Aaron A. Schwartz
Senior Associate, Balloon Animals, Egg Hunts & One Hell of a Record
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Karra Salim
Associate Clown, Former Prosecutor, Mini Megan (Loud Version)
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Jenna Goretzki
Associate Attorney, Juggling Division (Coulrophobic, High Potential)
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Suzanne McCort
Ring Manager, Ultimate Death Clown, Do Not Call Her Susie
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Brianna Taylor
Legal Assistant, Unicycle Logistics, Baller
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Alexis Rodriguez
Legal Assistant, Pie Delivery, Not Being Screamed At (Finally)
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